Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Wednesday weight Joke

I am so excited to get back into gym today that I thought I would share a little Joke:


Losing Weight
I'm a pretty over weight guy, about 250 lbs, so i wanted to lose some weight. I find this company that promises to be very motivating and guarantees weight loss. I call the company and order their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before me a sexy, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."
Without a second thought, I take off after her.
A few miles later huffing and puffing, I finally give up.
The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.
On the fifth day, I weigh myself and am delighted to find I have lost 10 lbs. as promised.
I call the company and order their 5-day/20 pound program.
The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning and beautiful woman I have ever seen in my life.
She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me."
Well, I'm out the door after her like a shot.
This girl is in excellent shape and I do my best, but no such luck.
So for the next four days, the same routine happens with me gradually getting in better and better shape.
Much to my delight on the fifth day when I weigh myself, I discovers that I have lost another 20 lbs. as promised.
I decide to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program."
"Absolutely," I replie, "I haven't felt this good in years."
The next day there's a knock at my door; and when I open it I find a huge muscular man standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads,"If I catch you, you are mine!!!"
I lost 63 pounds that week.

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

You're a wagon

Right ! 

I have been semi on the wagon now for a while- and since September last year have lost about 23kgs !! We are getting there ... 

Eat Clean - train dirty ! 

I did not win sleek geek - those bastards ... hahhaa I lost 14 kgs and some one who lost 16 won .. what the hell - how do you loose 16 in two months- I mean I know they may have had more to loose then me and so forth and so forth - but winning something I cant bloody use cos of lactose issues just sucks... I came fourth and won suppliments with freaking milk in them... boo

still training - can run now :) what what! was one of my major goals !! how ever still have plensh to loose so much keep eye on ball 

in more entertaining news: I have become a cheap date ! one glass of wine and I think I am the queen of the world ... like everyone needs to love me and I just love everyone.. infact its so bad I couldnt let myself out this weekend... for fear of having to find my good name in some dingy urine soaked hell hole in hout bay- need to find my happy place again (says me with a glass of wine in hand) 

anyhoo